One thing in this life I know is true, I totally take after my mother when comes to shopping. Whether I’m shopping for a new winter coat, or a major piece of furniture, I feel the need to go to as many stores as possible, explore as many options that are available to me, weigh the pros and cons carefully, and only then do I make a completely rash spur of the moment decision to agonize over later. Just ask Craig, its exhausting. I made him crazy when we shopped for our first couch, and only a little less crazy when ten years later we purchased our second couch. Looking for a new winter coat involves a series of buying, trying on and returning. I NEVER take the tags off of anything until I’m actually wearing it because I want to make sure I don’t change my mind.
Craig is the exact opposite, thank goodness, otherwise we’d never get anything accomplished. He takes the tags off his clothing as soon as we get home. He wears new things right away, and when he saw the couch we finally purchased after 2 months of me going back and forth, Craig knew it was the right purchase. As soon as it was delivered I was racking my brain about returning it, getting these awful butterflies in my stomach like I did the wrong thing, like its the end of the world and this is the very last piece of furniture I will ever own in my life and what if, god forbid, there is a better suited couch out there, I would have blown my chances to have it. Yeah, this is what goes on with almost every purchase I make. Even lipstick. And by the way, the couch is simply perfect and I’ve been thrilled to have it especially when Aleck spits up on it and I can wipe it clean in one step.
So for the moment my major object of obsession is a dresser for Aleck’s room. In all honesty it doesn’t help that I’ve been working on this never ending project with my mom since its their baby gift to Craig and I (Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou). Now we have two women, who must see every single possible dresser option known to man in order to make a decision, make that decision, and then obsess and stay awake at night worrying that we made the right decision.
So, the dresser was finally ordered almost 4 weeks ago, I felt good about it, my mom was up all night. The place we got it from said it would be about 3 weeks and we figured, that’s not so bad, I can stare at piles of clothes for another 3 weeks. After 3 weeks they told my mom it would be in on that Tuesday(11/21). Craig and I called on Sunday (11/19) to schedule the delivery. The people on the phone were very rude, saying that it was only getting shipped from the factory in Vermont on 11/21 and they didn’t know when they would have it. I explained that we had been told something else, the man on the phone answered by telling me that was impossible. My mom confirmed again that she was told by two different people we would have it in 3 weeks and that the store would have it on 11/21. He didn’t apologize, didn’t say someone made a mistake, just kept saying that it was impossible, no one said that. Well, that got me very upset. I don’t like being treated like an idiot by someone in a service industry, and underneath it all if felt a bit like he was calling us liars. When my mom called she got the same reaction and we both hit the roof. Why should we give them our business, now we have to wait another two weeks for this thing?!? And no one even said anything close to, “sorry”, or someone must have made a mistake.
They had also been rude to my mom when she went to go see the piece so this was just the icing on the cake of mistreatment by an overpriced baby store. Why in the world should they have our business? And if something goes wrong with the piece, these are the a-holes I would have to deal with? Thanks, but no thanks. We decided to cancel the order, and in order to get that order cancelled my mom told the owner of the store my entire sob story. Yuck. He needs to hear all of my stuff in order to treat his customers with any respect?!? That made me even more upset. Done. Not getting my business bud.
So I called the other place that had a dresser I LOVED even though it was a little pricey. My mom and I had both discussed that she wanted to get us a piece that could last Aleck for many years to come. I mean, in this day and age, why not pay more for a piece that can survive wear, tear, and not fall apart at the seams in two to three years. Most reviews I’ve read of standard baby dressers from the big names all say how they don’t last, scratch easily, knobs come off, etc. We loved the dresser my brother-in law has but that one’s drawers were peeling off after 4 years. Next. Anyway, this other place could deliver the dresser on Saturday, 11/26. Seriously?!? Done.
It came on Saturday, they moved it in, and I organized everything. Then Craig noticed that the knobs are really sharp and angular for a crawling baby or toddler. And its a little tall for a changing table, 40 inches high, will my mom be able to change him on there? On Saturday Craig and I agreed these weren’t issues, we could get a step stool for her if we need to, and we could wrap the knobs in foam, or simply change them out. It’s just one screw and its not a difficult task, even for my handy challenged husband (who am I kidding, my mom would probably do it…she’s got the major power tool collection). It certainly looks so good in the room and its got plenty of room both in it and on top of it without making the room feel small.
Sunday night I had the freak out. It’s too expensive, it’s too tall, the knobs are too dangerous, it’s too nice, it’s too wide, it’s just too much. In a panic I called my parents as they are driving home from Michigan talking so quickly they can barely understand me as I word vomit everything going on in my head. My dad tries to calm me down, “Just enjoy it”, my mom echoes his sentiments, both of them laughing over how I’m “Not crazy, just a lot like me”, says my mom, “crazy”, says my dad 😉 Lastly my mom tells me to sleep on it, I might feel differently in the morning.
After looking online everything else looks like cheap crap in comparison. Sitting in the glider this morning, nursing Aleck, the voices in my head are quieting, the butterflies are settling, and it just looks gorgeous. For as much as I sit in that glider, having something so good to look at is really comforting, and when I change him I have everything at my fingertips since its got so many drawers I can keep all his changing stuff in there and on top as well. Aaaah, peace at last. Maybe we’ll just get some cheap knobs when he starts becoming mobile.
I decided to share my new calm sentiments with my mom, thinking about how happy she’ll be that I’ve chilled out and am just enjoying this gorgeous and generous gift. She tells me, “Well he’s going to pee on it, he’s going to color on it.”. So, should I return it?? Is she now where I was last night? Just when I was starting to settle is it time to unsettle again? Are there any stores I’ve missed? Can I just call this task done and over?
Am I obsessing over this dresser because its easier to put way too much thought in this than in the road ahead of us? Is it easier to fixate on a piece of furniture than on Aleck’s challenges?
Tomorrow we go in for cast #3, and I’m going to talk to the orthotics women about a different splint for his left hand. The one they gave us we got on, but not all the way, and the screaming it takes to get it on is the kind of screaming that breaks a parent’s heart. You can hear the pain, not just annoyed, tired, frustrated, but pain, or as Heidi said, “Those are real tears.” Hopefully it won’t be too long of a day, I only anticipate 3 hours without any other curve balls for the day, but we shall see.
Wish us luck and let me know what you think about my dresser predicament. The one posted here is the one in his room right now.